Penance or Dependence

Throughout my youth, I have been taught biblical, sound, plain-and-simple truth. For too long, however, I was the sword drill queen, the goody goody, the know-it-all. All the Bible verses, all the answers -- Sunday School teachers counted on me. So, "harsh words stir up anger?" No problem. Another verse crossed off the list.

Don't misconstrue my words: I've benefited beyond comprehension from my parents' and authorities' careful moulding. Years later, internalized verses come to mind for rebuke, correction, and training in righteousness. Yet for a time, memorization was just what Jane Ellen did.

Back to the harsh words. To be honest, the watch tower of my lips was vacant for many, many years. Cobwebs and dust settled over its surfaces. Poisonous darts and slanderous missives sprung through the opening, eager to sting. Occasional self sufficient efforts to "do better tomorrow" usually ended in the rotten floor giving way under my feet. Feeble attempts to control my words failed more miserably than ever. So, the guard tower remained desolate, and my speech continued to pierce, deadly as arrows.

Years went by. Finally, I had a heart-to-heart with this passage, and the veil fell. Penance, that self-sufficient salvation, helped not a bit. To assume so is despicably selfish. As John Calvin affirmed, "Nothing good proceeds from a man, however perfect he be, that is not defiled by some spot." No matter how often we tug on a sapling, it will grow no faster into a tree. Similarly, expecting growth in return for independent attempts will never satisfy.

Readers, as the Father tends the orchard, so also He tends our hearts. Without the Gardener, we wilt, fade, die. Call out to the One who has food that nurtures, water that satisfies, and authority that empowers. He will not -- no -- cannot fail, for it's foreign to His formidable nature. Stooping to our level, only He can bring about growth. Are we willing to humble ourselves, fall at His feet, and beg for aid?